Funny thing about blogging. I have noticed in "Blog World" that we seem to feel a need to blog daily or we just aren't really doing it. There is often a need to post something, anything, every day or so. What we are worried about, I don't know. Will people stop reading our blog if we don't have frequent posts? Considering how many regular readers I have don't have, I will take my chances. Those who do read regularly certainly know consistency is not one of my stronger suits. Besides, we all know that what I do post is simply amazing, right?
I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you.
I am in a funk, fo sho. I am no longer terribly concerned with what I do or don't get done in the house. I am more concerned with actually getting out of the house. I never go anywhere that isn't necessary. This stems from being absofreakinglutely broke for months and months. Why go anywhere if I am just going to be focused on what I can't spend, and why waste the gas? Well, I'll tell you why. Because I become a shut in. A hermit. A frumpy, sheltered anti-social, lazy, depressed cave dweller. Entire buildings have been erected in my neighborhood! I had no idea. The trek from home to football practice to volleyball practice to the grocery store has not changed much, but there is a strip mall and condo complex up the street wondering just where in the hell I have been. So I am trying to pop my bubble a bit. I still don't have money to spend at a bookstore or a matinee, and I really should save the gas but I do need to get out of this fucking house!
So far, I seem to be doing well without insurance. But we all know that the day to day is not where the crises come in, it is in the unexpected and emergency situations that insurance is truly beneficial and appreciated. That can, of course, happen at anytime and it does cause anxiety! I am without my liver medication. That medicine did provide some day to day benefit, but it is really designed to be an ongoing and long term panacea. Eventually it will be greatly missed, but I am doing okay without it for now. It does prevent some aches and pains in the right upper quadrant, so I do miss it a tad but things could be a lot worse! I imagine not having insurance and needing something like insulin or heart medication or chemo. Yes, things could be worse. Always. I did apply for the state insurance for the kids. That was a bitter pill to swallow! But that plan is in place and intended for people just like us. I see it not as a handout, but a hand up. It will certainly do us no good to be saddled with (more) medical debt. Remember those two back-to-back ER visits we had when Katie fell and Tommy went on a magical mystery tour with the backyard mushrooms? I found out those visits may be covered as well, if we are approved. That'dbenice!
Speaking of medical crises, my dog's stomach just so happens to be making some very loud and strange noises this morning. Just thought I would share that.
It's raining here today, all day long. Sounds like a good excuse to stay in!
UPDATE: Hours after I wrote this, I received a package in the mail. An offer had been made to me, but honestly I had forgotten about it. Someone I know (and trust) sent me over two months worth of the medication I mentioned earlier. This person is in another country and receives it free, and they only take half of what is prescribed. They have it to spare, and wants to share it with me. You can judge me, you can judge this person. I don't care. I know what this is- a gift. I am overwhelmed with gratitude, looking at this full bottle of pills. Thank you.
You raise an interesting point about blogging frequency. I have to say that I do tend to feel better if I post with some regularity than when I go through dry spells. But, hey; you've got 24 followers to my 2 (and yes, I'm sincerely appreciative that you're one of them!). I figure I could blog every other hour or every other month and it wouldn't change a thing for anyone else. But then, I blog solely for myself--I think of it as an evolving, unorganized memoir.
ReplyDeleteAs for the need to get out and about, believe me I can appreciate that frustration! My car has been a paperweight for more than a year now; we just don't have the money to fix it, so I've only been able to go anywhere on my wife's days off from work. But then when you throw in obligatory errands, times she's busy with school work or doesn't feel like going anywhere, and I've been lucky to get out of the house once every three to four weeks on average. But then, you've seen my Twitter timeline; you know all this. ;-)
And believe me, I understand how upsetting it can be to have to apply for assistance programs of any kind. We're conditioned to believe in our capitalist society that people who succeed have earned what they have because they're good people. The flip side, of course, is that when things go wrong for us, it's implied that our misfortune is evidence that we are not good people, and that we deserve our misery as much as good people deserve their success. Of course, we know plenty of good people who've been screwed and plenty of people who haven't really earned most of what they have, but there it is. I'm encouraged that you've taken the position you have, though.